Scrum-ptious: The Joey

It probably doesn't look that scrumptious to you (sorry, my photography still hasn't got any better, though at least I've found out a little more about the focus...), but a) it actually was, and b) this is , of course, a rugby related post.
The letter, long awaited with baited breath, confirming that the filius has been chosen to join the Greater Birmingham squad (i.e. County level), finally arrived - hooray - and training sessions will be on a Wednesday at 6:30. No time for dinner, only for a fast food fix, something to eat on the hoof, in other words: fist food.

And some time earlier, when reading about New Orleans, I had come across a veritable carb & calorie cluster that seemed to fit the bill, the Muffuletta:

a giant quadruple-decker sesame bap, essentially Sicilian, stuffed with mortadella, prosciutto, provolone (1) and salami, further enhanced by olives and capers, and something called giardiniera (2).

That was the first thing I had to investigate. It's a pickled vegetable & garlic mixture. Sounded like just the thing to get some of the 5-a-day veg into an otherwise unwilling teenager. But all recipes stated that it needed to mature, so not for today. Also, I had no celery in. Apparently, in Cajun/Creole cooking, this would never happen, as all dishes seem to start with three blessed ingredients, also called The Holy Trinity: namely, onions, peppers and celery.

Never mind, I could probably make some garlic pickle and mayonnaise. But I found that we had run out of Patak's garlic pickle, and anyway, this didn't quite fit in with the Sicilian provenance. Also, did I really want to add more fat content to the 4 meat cuts and cheese?
So, in the end, I created a healthier sandwich filler/sauce, inspired by LaBelga of Leafy Cooking, namely a variation on her Budwig Mayonnaise. see there.

I used avocado oil (because I couldn't open the linseed oil bottle!!), cottage cheese, vinegar, mustard, smoked paprika and walnuts. I would have added gherkins but I couldn't open the jar (what's wrong with me?). I forgot the cheese (probably just as well), and I simply HAD to re-name it (c'mon, the boy is 14... -- "Yr 9! " need I say more?). The 4-fold meat filling and Sicilian connection made me immediately think of Joey from 'Friends', who is - certainly on the food front - one of my son's icons.

The Joey was very well received (in terms of taste, too), except for the walnuts and what he thought was feta cheese. So, blitzing it is, next time.

As it is the half term holiday, he's going on a rugby development programme on Thursday and Friday, so I think some baking is in order. BBD # 16 was so inspirational, I'm hoping to bake some bread for his lunch time requirement of 'complex sandwiches' (my boys' euphemism for multi-storey fillings).
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(1) Possible replacement: mozzarella
(2) Recipe to follow when I've made some